Jesus
is coming – there is no question.
Or
is there?
I
am so impatient. So skeptical. I doubt all motives, doubt that anything in
the world will ever get any better. Ah,
I’m even doubtful that I will have anything worthwhile to say here.
It’s
how I am. Is it how God made me, or how I’ve
twisted and warped my view of everything in the world? I crawl into the rabbit hole of my thoughts
and get lost at the first turn.
I
think about all the hurt in the world and get sad thinking about suffering and the
hopelessness of some situations. I lose
hope that some people – whole populations – will ever get to know Jesus. Who is out there to show them, to teach them
God’s word? That guy in the mountains of
Iraq, hiding out from his enemies, his only possession an old machine gun,
always ready to kill. What are the odds
that he will ever come to know Jesus?
I
think about the woman who has had yet another miscarriage, and how much she
wants a child, thinking her only option is to get pregnant over and over and
over, to receive nothing at the end of each ordeal but pain and grief. How can she come to know Jesus through this
heaviness?
We
will all be hurt someday. Someday, our
troubles will shadow every aspect of our lives for a period of time. It makes me feel like I am not ready for a
test of faith. It makes me think that my
skeptical nature could win and I will run from God the minute things get hard. It’s an option for me. It’s an option for all of us, no matter how
strong or faithful we think we might be.
I worry that I will become the next Job.
I don’t want to be Job.
It
bogs me down to think about troubles that I may have. It clouds Jesus’ light if I allow myself to
dwell there. Just toying with it here
makes me sad. I am disappointing God by having
these doubts. I’ve learned that a degree
of doubt can be helpful in growing faith, yet I think I’ve gone too far.
But.
So
far, in this period of life, God has not allowed me to dwell in that place for
long. He gave himself in his Word, his
Son, and his Spirit, to pull me along and to carry me through when things get
hard. These three things are simpler than the world’s
troubles, and they push the doubts from my mind. These things do not allow doubt to plant itself.
The
Holy Spirit gets a workout in dealing with me most days. It guides me and leads me to places I would
never go on my own. It prompts me to
act, to speak, to write, to pray. God’s
word is a comfort to me, a place of peace that I can rest when things threaten
my faith. The old saying that no matter
where you open a Bible, it lands on the spot that you most needed to read right
then? I do this often. God never fails me. Jesus is my role model and mentor, the prime
example of how to do life on earth. I may
get frustrated that I will never be as bold as Jesus and will never perform
miracles like him, but that is just empty comparison. I can be Jesus’ hands, his light, his love. And in Jesus is the hope of the world’s
troubles to end, of eternal life in heaven.
All
of these things help me to grow my faith.
All of these things bring me closer to God, our Creator and Father. They transform me into a person who is trying
to live this life more intentionally, whatever that looks like today. They tell me that eventually truth will win
out over doubts. Someday skepticism will
fade completely; the light of God will never again allow its shadow.
It’s
happening for me, and it’s happening for you, too. For all of us, no matter where we are.
*******
The Angel said to me, “These are dependable and accurate
words, every one. The God and Master of the spirits of the prophets sent his
Angel to show his servants what must take place, and soon. And tell them, ‘Yes,
I’m on my way!’ Blessed be the one who keeps the words of the prophecy of this
book.”
“I,
Jesus, sent my Angel to testify to these things for the churches. I’m the Root
and Branch of David, the Bright Morning Star.”
“Come!”
say the Spirit and the Bride.
Whoever
hears, echo, “Come!”
Is
anyone thirsty? Come!
All who will, come and drink,
Drink freely of the Water of Life!
All who will, come and drink,
Drink freely of the Water of Life!
He
who testifies to all these things says it again: “I’m on my way! I’ll be there
soon!”
Yes!
Come, Master Jesus!
Revelation
22:6-7, 16-17, 20 (The Message)
I often say.. that my guardian angel puts in a lot of overtime.....though I often joke that sometimes I think he must be taking a cigarette break... lol. Very much enjoyed this read.. totally relate-able.
ReplyDeleteThank you, friend. xo
DeleteAngels always seemed to me to be the tough guys of heaven. You know, like the bouncers, the firemen, the FBI.