I’ll be the first one to admit that I definitely do not meditate on God’s law day and night. I’m more preoccupied with things like: Did I take the chicken out of the fridge to thaw? We are out of paper towels again! Those kids better get out of bed! and Is it my turn to carpool today?
These are small things, which, if you’ve been paying attention at all, make up a life. Things that, not long ago, I bemoaned as obstructions that kept my life from being what I thought it should be. I was frustrated that these things are all-consuming and allow no room for anything else. I lamented that I would never be anything other than a mother if all I can manage doing is managing this family.
When the truth hit me and I realized that all of these things – the managing, the raising of children – are what God gave me to do right now, I stopped worrying about what I wasn’t doing and focused on doing what I was meant to do. Those things are sacred and mean a whole lot to God, so I relaxed and did them well.
But accepting God’s plan doesn’t necessarily mean that we are growing closer to God. In fact, my soul was still suffering. I was doing fine, but fine isn’t joyful. It isn’t grateful. It isn’t filled with the fruit of the Spirit no matter how hard we believe that we are cool with how life turned out.
This is not a minor thing in God’s eyes. He tells us over and over in the Bible to read, reflect, and meditate on his word in order to live a holy and righteous life, filled with spiritual peace. Every Bible study advises its students to memorize Scripture, to keep Bible verses in the back pockets of our minds, to be called up when faced with trials and to remind us to praise God in the good times. Just because the Holy Spirit moves in our lives daily, just because we know what Jesus did for us when he died on that cross, just because we walk outside and stand in awe of God’s creation – just because we are in tune to all of that doesn’t mean that we are constantly seeking and meditating on God’s living word.
It takes work to grow and to learn and to change. It takes time to mature. It takes very specific actions and decision-making to be nourished by God’s constant stream of wisdom.
Meditating on God’s word is not easy. It’s not natural. It’s hard to “fit in” to an already packed schedule (Just today I gazed at my very full calendar and said a quick “please please please God just let me get through next month”. But did I dive into his word? No.).
I would like to be like the tree that flourishes because it is planted in God’s stream of life-giving water, one that produces an abundance of fruit of the Spirit in time. God can be revealed in many ways, but the most personal is when he speaks to us through his word. His voice is within us when we read what he has to say. It isn't that we need to find a place to fit God's word into our lives, it's that when we make his word our priority, we will experience a blossoming in our lives. The best way to do this is to keep up the relationship through prayer, praise, and seeking his wisdom.
We just have to be willing to do the work. Time spent with God is never wasted. It never returns void, and every crumb of it matters to him.